The Hidden Step
www.necouncil.org/the
hidden
step
initially feels awkward but eventually becomes com-
fortable and a part of your routine.
Answering interview questions using
the natural approach also produces
the least effective outcomes. An-
swering questions such as “What are
your salary requirements?” the natu-
ral way (mentioning a number), or
“Why did you leave your last job?”
and blurting something like: “I was
laid off” are the easiest and most
natural ways to respond but produce the least desir-
able outcomes.
The natural approach does not work
Using the natural approach produces ineffective results in most every area of our
life. To be effective, one develops skills. For instance, when criticized by some-
one, the most natural thing to do is to become confrontational or to defend one’s
position.
This is the most natural approach for almost everyone. Yet, this is also the least
effective manner to handle this situation. When criticized a skilled communica-
tor takes a different approach. He or she may respond with: “Thank you for your
thoughtfulness. I understand your point and will look into your suggestion. I
want to thank you for caring about me enough to bring this to my attention. As
far as I can remember, you have always looked out for my best
interest.”
By recognizing that those suggestions are only opinions and that it is important
to respect the opinion of others, you are demonstrating a learned skill. We are not
born knowing how to respond in these situations. One learns to be effective by
acquiring skills similar to this.